January 21, 2007
Sermon # 662
Whatever you do not respect you loose!
Genesis 31:10 - 42 (NKJV) 10"And it happened, at the time when the flocks conceived, that I lifted my eyes and saw in a dream, and behold, the rams which leaped upon the flocks were streaked, speckled, and gray-spotted. 11Then the Angel of God spoke to me in a dream, saying, ‘Jacob.’ And I said, ‘Here I am.’ 12And He said, ‘Lift your eyes now and see, all the rams which leap on the flocks are streaked, speckled, and gray-spotted; for I have seen all that Laban is doing to you. 13I am the God of Bethel, where you anointed the pillar and where you made a vow to Me. Now arise, get out of this land, and return to the land of your family.’" 14Then Rachel and Leah answered and said to him, "Is there still any portion or inheritance for us in our father’s house? 15Are we not considered strangers by him? For he has sold us, and also completely consumed our money. 16For all these riches which God has taken from our father are really ours and our children’s; now then, whatever God has said to you, do it." 17Then Jacob rose and set his sons and his wives on camels. 18And he carried away all his livestock and all his possessions which he had gained, his acquired livestock which he had gained in Padan Aram, to go to his father Isaac in the land of Canaan. 19Now Laban had gone to shear his sheep, and Rachel had stolen the household idols that were her father’s. 20And Jacob stole away, unknown to Laban the Syrian, in that he did not tell him that he intended to flee. 21So he fled with all that he had. He arose and crossed the river, and headed toward the mountains of Gilead. 22And Laban was told on the third day that Jacob had fled. 23Then he took his brethren with him and pursued him for seven days’ journey, and he overtook him in the mountains of Gilead. 24But God had come to Laban the Syrian in a dream by night, and said to him, "Be careful that you speak to Jacob neither good nor bad." 25So Laban overtook Jacob. Now Jacob had pitched his tent in the mountains, and Laban with his brethren pitched in the mountains of Gilead. 26And Laban said to Jacob: "What have you done, that you have stolen away unknown to me, and carried away my daughters like captives taken with the sword? 27Why did you flee away secretly, and steal away from me, and not tell me; for I might have sent you away with joy and songs, with timbrel and harp? 28And you did not allow me to kiss my sons and my daughters. Now you have done foolishly in so doing. 29It is in my power to do you harm, but the God of your father spoke to me last night, saying, ‘Be careful that you speak to Jacob neither good nor bad.’ 30And now you have surely gone because you greatly long for your father’s house, but why did you steal my gods?" 31Then Jacob answered and said to Laban, "Because I was afraid, for I said, ‘Perhaps you would take your daughters from me by force.’ 32With whomever you find your gods, do not let him live. In the presence of our brethren, identify what I have of yours and take it with you." For Jacob did not know that Rachel had stolen them. 33And Laban went into Jacob’s tent, into Leah’s tent, and into the two maids’ tents, but he did not find them. Then he went out of Leah’s tent and entered Rachel’s tent. 34Now Rachel had taken the household idols, put them in the camel’s saddle, and sat on them. And Laban searched all about the tent but did not find them. 35And she said to her father, "Let it not displease my lord that I cannot rise before you, for the manner of women is with me." And he searched but did not find the household idols. 36Then Jacob was angry and rebuked Laban, and Jacob answered and said to Laban: "What is my trespass? What is my sin, that you have so hotly pursued me? 37Although you have searched all my things, what part of your household things have you found? Set it here before my brethren and your brethren, that they may judge between us both! 38These twenty years I have been with you; your ewes and your female goats have not miscarried their young, and I have not eaten the rams of your flock. 39That which was torn by beasts I did not bring to you; I bore the loss of it. You required it from my hand, whether stolen by day or stolen by night. 40There I was! In the day the drought consumed me, and the frost by night, and my sleep departed from my eyes. 41Thus I have been in your house twenty years; I served you fourteen years for your two daughters, and six years for your flock, and you have changed my wages ten times. 42Unless the God of my father, the God of Abraham and the Fear of Isaac, had been with me, surely now you would have sent me away empty-handed. God has seen my affliction and the labor of my hands, and rebuked you last night." 43And Laban answered and said to Jacob, "These daughters are my daughters, and these children are my children, and this flock is my flock; all that you see is mine. But what can I do this day to these my daughters or to their children whom they have borne? 44Now therefore, come, let us make a covenant, you and I, and let it be a witness between you and me." 45So Jacob took a stone and set it up as a pillar. 46Then Jacob said to his brethren, "Gather stones." And they took stones and made a heap, and they ate there on the heap. 47Laban called it £Jegar Sahadutha, but Jacob called it £Galeed. 48And Laban said, "This heap is a witness between you and me this day." Therefore its name was called Galeed, 49also Mizpah,£ because he said, "May the Lord watch between you and me when we are absent one from another. 50If you afflict my daughters, or if you take other wives besides my daughters, although no man is with us—see, God is witness between you and me!" 51Then Laban said to Jacob, "Here is this heap and here is this pillar, which I have placed between you and me. 52This heap is a witness, and this pillar is a witness, that I will not pass beyond this heap to you, and you will not pass beyond this heap and this pillar to me, for harm. 53The God of Abraham, the God of Nahor, and the God of their father judge between us." And Jacob swore by the Fear of his father Isaac. 54Then Jacob offered a sacrifice on the mountain, and called his brethren to eat bread. And they ate bread and stayed all night on the mountain. 55And early in the morning Laban arose, and kissed his sons and daughters and blessed them. Then Laban departed and returned to his place.
ILL: Let me break this story down for you.
Jacob went to his uncle and told him " I am in love with your daughter Rachel and I want her for my wife. Labon answered, "work for me for 7 years and you can have her" – so that’s what Jacob did.
Labon had no respect for his word, Jacob, or Rachel so he tricked him and gave him ugly Leah insead.
When Jacob protested Labon said, "work for me 7 more years and I will give you Rachel. He also promised Jacob that he could have all of the speckled and spotted animals.
When Jacob married Rachel, Labon had no respect for his word and would not let Jacob go free.
All of Labon’s possessions were contained within the boundaries of his Idols. (teraphim) Teraphim were markers that were suppose to protect the property within the borders and Rachel took them!
Now for the point of the story – Labon lost his property- his daughters – and his grandchildren because he did not respect them and he had to put up a marker to show his boundary and therefore his respect for Jacob!
What or Who you will not respect you will loose! Respect is showing honor, nourishing, and cherishing!
In Marriage
Adultery is at its heart lack of respect and honor for your mate
Matthew 19:3 - 9 (NKJV) 3The Pharisees also came to Him, testing Him, and saying to Him, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for just any reason?" 4And He answered and said to them, "Have you not read that He who £made them at the beginning ‘made them male and female,’£ 5and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’?£ 6So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate." 7They said to Him, "Why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?" 8He said to them, "Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. 9And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for £sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery."
Having a sexual relationship with another person outside of your marriage is adultery.
Marrying a known adulterer is adultery.
ILL: If they ran out and had sexual relationship with another man or woman other than their husband or wife – they will with you!
ILL: Let me give you a harder one:
Matthew 5:27 - 28 (NKJV) 27"You have heard that it was said £to those of old, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ 28But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.
The person into pornography is an adulterer!
An unbeliever who wants to leave the Christian
1 Corinthians 7:10 - 16 (NKJV) 10Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord: A wife is not to depart from her husband. 11But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. And a husband is not to divorce his wife. 12But to the rest I, not the Lord, say: If any brother has a wife who does not believe, and she is willing to live with him, let him not divorce her. 13And a woman who has a husband who does not believe, if he is willing to live with her, let her not divorce him. 14For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband; otherwise your children would be unclean, but now they are holy. 15But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace. 16For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife?
If your mate will not respect your relationship to Christ they are not honoring you – let them go! – What they will not honor they loose!
I have no Biblical basis but I also believe that if a spouse physically abuses you – they are not honoring you and should loose you!
How to keep a marriage – Honor!
ILL: If you did not get or hear last weeks message – get it!
Ephesians 5:32 - 33 (NKJV) 32This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church. 33Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.
Paul has already written:
Ephesians 5:20 - 21 (NKJV) 20giving thanks always for all things to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, 21submitting to one another in the fear of God.
The word "submitting" has more to do with honor than obedience – you can only honor what you respect. Wives only receive honor by what the husband completes them for or does for them. Husbands only receive honor by what the wife does with them.
The Children
Ephesians 6:1 - 8 (NKJV) 1Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2"Honor your father and mother," which is the first commandment with promise: 3"that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth."£ 4And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord. 5Bondservants, be obedient to those who are your masters according to the flesh, with fear and trembling, in sincerity of heart, as to Christ; 6not with eyeservice, as men-pleasers, but as bondservants of Christ, doing the will of God from the heart, 7with goodwill doing service, as to the Lord, and not to men, 8knowing that whatever good anyone does, he will receive the same from the Lord, whether he is a slave or free.
Children have to be taught how to honor
Deuteronomy 4:9 - 10 (NKJV) 9Only take heed to yourself, and diligently keep yourself, lest you forget the things your eyes have seen, and lest they depart from your heart all the days of your life. And teach them to your children and your grandchildren, 10especially concerning the day you stood before the Lord your God in Horeb, when the Lord said to me, ‘Gather the people to Me, and I will let them hear My words, that they may learn to fear Me all the days they live on the earth, and that they may teach their children.’
God said "teach them…that they may learn to fear."
Fear is the great motivation for discipline
Teach – all the time and everywhere!
Deuteronomy 6:3 - 9 (NKJV) 3Therefore hear, O Israel, and be careful to observe it, that it may be well with you, and that you may multiply greatly as the Lord God of your fathers has promised you—‘a land flowing with milk and honey.’£ 4"Hear, O Israel: £The Lord our God, the Lord is one! 5You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength. 6"And these words which I command you today shall be in your heart. 7You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up. 8You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. 9You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.
Discipline which does not provoke your children to wrath
Proverbs 13:24 (NKJV) 24 He who spares his rod hates his son, But he who loves him disciplines him promptly.
ILL: The little boy had been misbehaving in Church "Pray" he cried out as his father drug him out to the restroom.
ILL: I believe that the Dr. Spock generation has been the destruction of America. You cannot reason out dishonor and rebellion.
Proverbs 10:13 (NKJV) 13 Wisdom is found on the lips of him who has understanding, But a rod is for the back (side) of him who is devoid of understanding.
ILL: I was about 14 years old when I received the phonograph for Christmas. "Paul" my father told me, "this is a very nice and very expensive piece of equipment. The instructions say that records should never be left standing on the spindle. It has springs to protect the machine and records, it has a diamond needle. It should never have more than 12 records at a time and they should be put up when you are finished listening. The first time he found the equipment with a full stack of records when it was not being used he warned me. The second time – by – by phonograph! I never saw it again! But I learned a lesson. I have the oil changed in the car when it supposed to be changed. I have a boat. The motor is winterized, the equipment oiled, the boat stored during the cold months when I’m not using it. – The lesson I learned from loosing the phonograph - What you do not appreciate – you loose!
If that child abuses the car or drives it in an illegal manor – the driver’s privilege is gone! – You may be saving the child’s life!
If a child takes something that does not belong to (him or her) they return it, apologize, and then do some service to pay the price of the object!
I used one word of profanity in front of my father –the rod of correction was applied to my rear so that my mouth would learn never to say that word again!
When my son, Dennis, was arrested for speeding, passing another car on a bridge, and having drugs in a car I told the police – "keep him in jail so that he gets to understand what it feels like!"
My father just died September, one year ago at 93, when he said something I answered, "yes sir!" – to my Mother I said, "yes maim!" I never addressed my father or mother by their first name – there is no respect in familiarity. My children nor my grandchildren do not call me by my first name.
Leviticus 19:32 (NKJV) 32‘You shall rise before the gray headed and honor the presence of an old man, and fear your God: I am the Lord.
What God is saying is, "if you do not learn discipline and respect I will see that circumstances teach them to you!’
Deuteronomy 5:16 (NKJV) 16 ‘Honor your father and your mother, as the Lord your God has commanded you, that your days may be long, and that it may be well with you in the land which the Lord your God is giving you.
ILL: Put that in the negative, "If you do not honor father and mother your days will not be long and it will not be well with you!"
What do I do with my teen-ager?
You have to make the discipline match the offense – but mean what you say and say what you mean!
Conclusion:
It’s all about honor – If you love you provide and protect and respect. That’s what submission is – and if you do not respect something or someone – you loose!
