July 30, 2006
Sermon #636
1st Corinthians series #10
Guidelines for Married People
Introduction: We must remember that the apostle Paul is answering questions and problems asked by the Corinthians. So, in these letters we are not following a doctrinal order or a theological argument but Paul is writing a loosely constructed letter dealing with the issues.
1 Corinthians 7:1 - 17 (NKJV) 1Now concerning the things of which you wrote to me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. 2Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband. 3Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband. 4The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. 5Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. 6But I say this as a concession, not as a commandment. 7For I wish that all men were even as I myself. But each one has his own gift from God, one in this manner and another in that. 8But I say to the unmarried and to the widows: It is good for them if they remain even as I am; 9but if they cannot exercise self-control, let them marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion. 10Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord: A wife is not to depart from her husband. 11But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. And a husband is not to divorce his wife. 12But to the rest I, not the Lord, say: If any brother has a wife who does not believe, and she is willing to live with him, let him not divorce her. 13And a woman who has a husband who does not believe, if he is willing to live with her, let her not divorce him. 14For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband; otherwise your children would be unclean, but now they are holy. 15But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace. 16For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife? 17But as God has distributed to each one, as the Lord has called each one, so let him walk. And so I ordain in all the churches.
1 Corinthians 7:25 - 40 (NKJV) 25Now concerning virgins: I have no commandment from the Lord; yet I give judgment as one whom the Lord in His mercy has made trustworthy. 26I suppose therefore that this is good because of the present distress—that it is good for a man to remain as he is: 27Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be loosed. Are you loosed from a wife? Do not seek a wife. 28But even if you do marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin marries, she has not sinned. Nevertheless such will have trouble in the flesh, but I would spare you. 29But this I say, brethren, the time is short, so that from now on even those who have wives should be as though they had none, 30those who weep as though they did not weep, those who rejoice as though they did not rejoice, those who buy as though they did not possess, 31and those who use this world as not misusing it. For the form of this world is passing away. 32But I want you to be without care. He who is unmarried cares for the things of the Lord—how he may please the Lord. 33But he who is married cares about the things of the world—how he may please his wife. (continued)
34There is a difference between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman cares about the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit. But she who is married cares about the things of the world—how she may please her husband. 35And this I say for your own profit, not that I may put a leash on you, but for what is proper, and that you may serve the Lord without distraction. 36But if any man thinks he is behaving improperly toward his virgin, if she is past the flower of youth, and thus it must be, let him do what he wishes. He does not sin; let them marry. 37Nevertheless he who stands steadfast in his heart, having no necessity, but has power over his own will, and has so determined in his heart that he will keep his virgin, does well. 38So then he who gives her in marriage does well, but he who does not give her in marriage does better. 39A wife is bound by law as long as her husband lives; but if her husband dies, she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord. 40But she is happier if she remains as she is, according to my judgment—and I think I also have the Spirit of God.
I. Guidelines for Single Christians
The question is: “Should those who were married and divorced before becoming a Christian remarry?’
A. Three kinds of single Christians
1 Corinthians 7:8 - 9 (NKJV) 8But I say to the unmarried and to the widows: It is good for them if they remain even as I am; 9but if they cannot exercise self-control, let them marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion.
-Unmarried
- Widows
1 Corinthians 7:34 (NKJV) 34There is a difference between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman cares about the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit. But she who is married cares about the things of the world—how she may please her husband.
Virgins
B. Unmarried are divorced people – who were divorced before they became a Christian.
ILL: It is best if they become like Paul
1 Corinthians 7:8 (NKJV) 8But I say to the unmarried and to the widows: It is good for them if they remain even as I am;
ILL: Paul was a member of the Sanhedrin and they had to be married.
Galatians 1:13 - 14 (NKJV) 13For you have heard of my former conduct in Judaism, how I persecuted the church of God beyond measure and tried to destroy it. 14And I advanced in Judaism beyond many of my contemporaries in my own nation, being more exceedingly zealous for the traditions of my fathers.
Romans 16:13 (NKJV) 13Greet Rufus, chosen in the Lord, and his mother and mine.
ILL: Question? His mother-in-law?
C. Widows are single people who formerly were married but were severed from that relationship by the death of the spouse
D. Virgins are single people who have never been married
E. Better to marry than burn with sexual drive
1 Corinthians 7:8 - 9 (NKJV) 8But I say to the unmarried and to the widows: It is good for them if they remain even as I am; 9but if they cannot exercise self-control, let them marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion.
F. It is good to remain single –it will save you a lot of problems
1 Corinthians 7:25 - 28 (NKJV) 25Now concerning virgins: I have no commandment from the Lord; yet I give judgment as one whom the Lord in His mercy has made trustworthy. 26I suppose therefore that this is good because of the present distress—that it is good for a man to remain as he is: 27Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be loosed. Are you loosed from a wife? Do not seek a wife. 28But even if you do marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin marries, she has not sinned. Nevertheless such will have trouble in the flesh, but I would spare you.
ILL: Paul recognized that the persecution under Nero was going to come!
G. Don’t marry an unbeliever!
2 Corinthians 6:14 - 18 (NKJV) 14Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness? 15And what accord has Christ with Belial? Or what part has a believer with an unbeliever? 16And what agreement has the temple of God with idols? For you are the temple of the living God. As God has said: “I will dwell in them And walk among them. I will be their God, And they shall be My people.� 17Therefore “Come out from among them And be separate, says the Lord. Do not touch what is unclean, And I will receive you.� 18“I will be a Father to you, And you shall be My sons and daughters, Says the LORD Almighty.�
II. Guidelines for Christians married to other Christians
1 Corinthians 7:10 - 11 (NKJV) 10Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord: A wife is not to depart from her husband. 11But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. And a husband is not to divorce his wife.
The Lord’s answer
Matthew 19:3 - 9 (NKJV) 3The Pharisees also came to Him, testing Him, and saying to Him, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for just any reason?� 4And He answered and said to them, “Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning ‘made them male and female,’ 5and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? 6So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.� 7They said to Him, “Why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?� 8He said to them, “Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. 9And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery.�
ILL: One of the hardest things I have had to do in the ministry was to refuse to marry a couple I liked very much. – They were both Christians – He was a divorced man – Neither he nor his wife had committed adultery – They still loved each other, in fact he still supported his first wife but he said that they just could not get along enough to live with each other. I believe he was still married – spiritually – emotionally if not physically. I could not bless her to move into adultery! The word is not a suggestion it is a command!
Matthew 5:31 - 32 (NKJV) 31“Furthermore it has been said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’ 32But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery.
III. Guidelines for Christians Married to Unbelievers who want to stay married.
1 Corinthians 7:12 - 15 (NKJV) 12But to the rest I, not the Lord, say: If any brother has a wife who does not believe, and she is willing to live with him, let him not divorce her. 13And a woman who has a husband who does not believe, if he is willing to live with her, let her not divorce him. 14For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband; otherwise your children would be unclean, but now they are holy. 15But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace.
ILL: If you want to live with them and believe that God will save them – stay!
ILL: Children in the tribulation
Matthew 24:15 - 31 (NKJV) 15“Therefore when you see the ‘abomination of desolation,’ spoken of by Daniel the prophet, standing in the holy place� (whoever reads, let him understand), 16“then let those who are in Judea flee to the mountains. 17Let him who is on the housetop not go down to take anything out of his house. 18And let him who is in the field not go back to get his clothes. 19But woe to those who are pregnant and to those who are nursing babies in those days! 20And pray that your flight may not be in winter or on the Sabbath. 21For then there will be great tribulation, such as has not been since the beginning of the world until this time, no, nor ever shall be. 22And unless those days were shortened, no flesh would be saved; but for the elect’s sake those days will be shortened. 23“Then if anyone says to you, ‘Look, here is the Christ!’ or ‘There!’ do not believe it. 24For false christs and false prophets will rise and show great signs and wonders to deceive, if possible, even the elect. 25See, I have told you beforehand. 26“Therefore if they say to you, ‘Look, He is in the desert!’ do not go out; or ‘Look, He is in the inner rooms!’ do not believe it. 27For as the lightning comes from the east and flashes to the west, so also will the coming of the Son of Man be. 28For wherever the carcass is, there the eagles will be gathered together. 29“Immediately after the tribulation of those days the sun will be darkened, and the moon will not give its light; the stars will fall from heaven, and the powers of the heavens will be shaken. 30Then the sign of the Son of Man will appear in heaven, and then all the tribes of the earth will mourn, and they will see the Son of Man coming on the clouds of heaven with power and great glory. 31And He will send His angels with a great sound of a trumpet, and they will gather together His elect from the four winds, from one end of heaven to the other.
ILL: Children of the righteous (some say you cannot claim God’s promises – but I do!)
Proverbs 11:21 (NKJV) 21 Though they join ï‚£forces, the wicked will not go unpunished; But the posterity of the righteous will be delivered.
Psalms 103:17 - 18 (NKJV) 17 But the mercy of the LORD is from everlasting to everlasting On those who fear Him, And His righteousness to children’s children, 18 To such as keep His covenant, And to those who remember His commandments to do them.
IV. Guidelines for Christians Married to Unbelievers who want to leave
1 Corinthians 7:15 - 16 (NKJV) 15But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace. 16For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife?
A. Let him = Chorizo (help them divorce)
B. Bondage = no bonds!
C. Peace = fighting, turmoil, bickering, criticism and violence destroy peace but God has called you to peace –
Conclusion:
Marriage should be a permanent relationship – it isn’t easy – but it is God’s best!
1 Corinthians 7:39 - 40 (NKJV) 39A wife is bound by law as long as her husband lives; but if her husband dies, she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord. 40But she is happier if she remains as she is, according to my judgment—and I think I also have the Spirit of God.
